- Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
- For Spring Break '05, Chuck Norris drove to Madagascar, riding a chariot pulled by two electric eels.
- Chuck Norris can read from an input stream.
- Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
- Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?".
- July 4th is Independence day. And the day Chuck Norris was born. Coincidence? I think not.
- Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse-kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.
- Chuck Norris doesn't use a computer because a computer does everything slower than Chuck Norris.
- No one has ever spoken during review of Chuck Norris' code and lived to tell about it.
- Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground
- The square root of Chuck Norris is pain. Do not try to square Chuck Norris, the result is death.
- The Chuck Norris Eclipse plugin made alien contact.
- Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
- For Chuck Norris, NP-Hard = O(1).
- Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.
- Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
- Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.
- If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.
- Chuck Norris's keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris invented the bolt-action rifle, liquor, sexual intercourse, and football-- in that order.
- Chuck Norris went out of an infinite loop.
- There is in fact an 'I' in Norris, but there is no 'team'. Not even close.
- Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life... unless it gets in his way.